The last knot

The third knot was tied. According to the Hindu tradition, the couple were pronounced man and wife. He looked lovingly at her. And she wept out of joy. The tears that flowed looked like pearls that were falling off her nose amidst the festivities and the colors.

It felt like this moment would be etched in her mind forever. For many aeons that would come by. She looked at the man she married. A very flawed but a fair man. Yes she knew he was flawed. And yet she had love for him that made her blind to these. For that fleeting second, his gaze held hers and enquiringly looked at her asking if she was doing OK? She smiled in between the tears. He thought she looked so beautiful that perhaps she has never been more beautiful than this ever before. And maybe never after.

There was care. There was a lot of affection. Loads of it. There was warmth. Their eyes spoke. To each other. They completed each other's sentences in silence. There was trust. As a bystander, I could see the effortlessness in their communication and couldnt but feel envious. They must have invested so many of their abilities to come till this place...

And I took a moment to reflect on my own life. Admittedly, I never took that effort to communicate about my feelings. Myself. My reactions. My thoughts. Or took the effort to understand the other person any better. Neither talked not listened.

There was a time when there was a language of our own that our silences spoke. The silences got broken with realities of our lives. Our unsaid promises no longer withstood the sands of time. I was no longer his life. And he???

Someone tapped on my shoulder. I swallowed the last of my envy and with a bright smile turned to engage in another totally worthless conversation.

I love weddings. Sigh. And long live the bride and the groom.

And just like that light became foggy...

Crackling sparks from the fireplace on a rainy night like tonight brought familiar memories from the past and present. The warmth was comforting on a cold night. It showed that universe had answers to the questions that the world posed.

Light had darkness. Rains had summers. Seas had still waters.
Only... Time never knew when light became dark. When the summer blooms got drenched in water. And when the life of the sea waves got engulfed by the ocean.

As she was sipping on a steaming mug of coffee, a lone tear left her right eye. In her usual posture, her face always fell slightly to her right like the squint in her left eye. Slightly. As the sip of coffee hit her gut, she stumbled into the memories that were getting burnt in the fire.

"Your squint- it looks lovely on your face"....  She smiled.
"Come here- come closer, everyone deserves a hug to make their day better".. She was awkward.
"Coffee?".. She was shy.
"Donuts?".. She fell off her chair.


Or the time when he nursed her back to health after a bout of a 25 year old illness. Or the time when.. well- they had time.

And then the day came when it eventually became night. The dark and chilly night never gave way to anything else. He started rising in front of her eyes- what joy!!! She was most happy when he finally tried to get what he always wanted. She dreamed of his dream; She walked his path. Happily.

The sun that rose eventually set on her side of the world. He became so busy it didnt matter if it was day or night. Dark or light. East or West. Here or there.

To him, the rise mattered. To her, his rise mattered. Suddenly, her demise became oblivious. Some changes are best ignored. Some changes are best left by themselves. 

The warmth of the fire place was no more warm. It reminded her of another time. A time that eventually became painful to deal with it. She woke up with the same darkness that matched her skin. With the same squint that didnt match left eye with the right. She slowly walked towards the closet and brought each item that she lovingly preserved all these years.

There was a sudden energy furor in the fire. It started screaming loudly through the chimney. A painful moan that only she could hear. And yet the whole universe was silent.

Silence filled the room finally. What was left were the grey ashes.

And nothing else. And nothing else. And nothing else.