190 - Laws of economics

Let's talk Economics 101 today.

Law of diminishing marginal utility.

Say what?? Basically goes a bit like:

1. You are super hungry
2. There are dozens of mangoes
3. You eat a mango and you are the happiest
4. You eat the second. It does not make you as happy as the first mango.
5. You come to the third and by now your happiness index is steadily going down.
6. Loop continues until you say, "enough of mangoes"!

Get the picture? Is it relevant? Hell, yeah! Every single time, it is applicable. I kid you not. Try it.

1. Let's go to cinema. After one you are bored.
2. Lets' east biryani. After a few minutes, you dont want to eat anymore.
3. You joined new place of work?? super happy. Wait for six months.
4. You are in a relationship. All happy in the beginning. And then..........

:-) See the point?

189 - Helping others, perils et al

I guess, today is the day I really will swear to myself and on myself, that I shall never ever think about doing the right thing by people. I wont.

It's exactly like the story, "the mark of Vishnu". When you "know" that the other person is being a ch***ya, then the lesson is just walk fking away. Miles off.

The donkey really hit me hard in the shin today. 

188 - October. And me.

I saw the movie October and decided that it deserves a post.
Taking something that is so a part of life, so trivial, Shoojit has cracked a very engaging and intense tale.
I will stay away from writing a review. Many have treaded that path.

That I now look forward to more Varun Dhawan movies is not a secret anymore. He is fab. My respect for KJo increased many fold after I have seen how V and Alia have evolved since Student of the year.

Many things in my life are going on. Around my huge family. Not much I can control. I would like to help solve them all, but I cant. And yet, I cant help but feel the incompleteness.

The disjoint-ness of my soul helps sometimes. 

187 - A strange solitude. Welcome?

Floating around the room, a sense of disconnect persists. Like a fly on the wall. You see everything and yet dont belong there. The body of a fly knows this really well.

Feels like I am floating happily un-belonged. There's a time in life when all 3 dimensions of your life become tired- Body, mind and soul. Tired of feeling unwanted and uncared for. Tired of the self-blaming cycle. Tired of being overtly harsh to self to be above water where judgments, views, opinions become recriminations at times.

Tired wondering when the next rain comes to nurture the drought infested soul. Tired of trying. Tired of fighting. Tired of being strong.

So tired that you are just happy in your skin- being disconnected and disjoint.

Converting unwelcome loneliness to welcome it's more favorable cousin- solitude.

186- The shout for justice.. Ugh!!!!!!!!!!

As I ride back home in a rickety rick, I saw a lot of protests. Usually, they dont disturb much, considering that I am happily lost in my thoughts and world.

But everytime I see people holding candles, I just know the cause. A rape. Many rapes. And every single time, I struggle to understand the reason.

What do we achieve? As a society, is it a sign of progression that we now "talk" about it? Or that everytime we take to roads, for fighting for someone's justice, we still end up disrespecting our people in the family at home continuously- in some form or the other.

And the utmost irony is I struggle to understand what is the definition of "justice"? How do you do it? Like you think killing the perpetrator or harming him/her, you provided justice? That we think by doing this we can keep the "victim" feel better is fundamentally flawed.

A victim will perhaps feel a lot better when he/she is accepted better by 'US'. We the people. We, the society. When we as a society start treating our children and family and neighborhood with lot more respect and grace than we do today. When we start judging them a lot less harsher.

THAT.