Marshall (the speaker) was the common interest. It was neither Longfellow's poetry nor Fitzgerald crooning that wafted in the house. It was the overpowering silence that was screaming between the two people who were living in it. None paying any attention to anything else but their own thoughts- which were about others.
S(he) said, S(he) said-
"I can't believe you changed so much over the years! You were so caring earlier. How come you have become like this? I dont recognize you anymore!"
"Oh really! It's not like you didnt change! You werent like this way back! Do you remember how forthcoming and light you were when we met the first time?"
"That was when you were fun. Then you focused on your work. I was invisible to you. You were not even conscious of my presence. Did not pay attention to the lunch I packed for you. All that mattered was your ambition."
There was a pause... In the noise.
Marshall started making it's presence felt.
Some folks can lose the blues in their hearts
But when I think of you another shower starts
Into each life some rain must fall
But too much is falling in mine
An eternity passed. Heavy breaths. Panting breaths. High stress on the angry bodies that were shouting. In another day and age, these breaths denoted a home coming. A coming together of hearts and bodies. Heaviness denoting an earth shattering climax. A common goal that was happy. That was not a race. That help love. That held safety.
The battle resumed.
"There was a time when you initiated interesting chats. There was a time when you asked me out. told me how pretty I looked. Heck, you bought me clothes."
"Fk- is that what this is about? It is an easy thing to fix. Let's go shopping and I shall buy you clothes".
Pause.........
Heavy breathing.
"Dont insult me like that ever again. I dont need your monies. I make enough of mine to take me shopping. I am hinting that you lost interest in me"
"What non sense? It's not like we are teenagers. Of course we go thru journeys that can make us weary. But this is life, Isnt'it?"
Marshall stopped playing the song. But thought for a second- how/why do these people turn me "on" and then fight? It's like there is no respect in my letting go off my beauty. Such a waste of my energy and sperm! :-) Well, Marshall is of course that boy. :-)
His thoughts were perturbed. Yet again. Someone started yelling. He was sure it was Ella from deep his belly. This was one of his personal favourites.
BUT. The noise overtook his thought process again and he sighed.
"Why should I accept this unhappy life? You gave me this ring and told me your soul was in it. You said it was for both of us. And yet- you removed yours so nonchalantly. Didnt you think I noticed?"
"Heck- it cant be about the ring!! I am happy to wear it again but it was feeling uncomfy and I removed. There was no other thought to that action except my comfort. Is that too much to understand?"
"Yes. Yes it is too much to understand. I could have understood you had you involved me in your journey. Had you included me in it. You and I had very separate paths and you decided it was OK."
"That's not true. You got the benefits of my hard work too. Let's just say that both of us screwed up and move on from here. I am tired of this fighting. Can we call it quits?"
"Actually... No. Sometimes. It is not both the people who screw up. It is only one of them. In our case, it was most definitely you. That's a mistake. It was not expectations. But it was your jaded philosophy of rationalizing what works for you. And at the same time getting conveniences from me. Let's call out."
Marshall wilted. Fitzgerald was egging him to complete the song.
Into each life some rain must fall
But too much, too much is fallin' in mine
Into each heart some tears must fall
But some day the sun will shine
But some day the sun will shine. Unfortunately neither of them have invested in patience. And honesty. he sighed again. He knew for sure over the past generations that he has been seeing the family, that the only truth of the matter was Marshall was never utilized to the fullest. Fk, he had a brilliant voice. Aye, he did.
His dad Jim must be rolling in his grave.
S(he) said, S(he) said-
"I can't believe you changed so much over the years! You were so caring earlier. How come you have become like this? I dont recognize you anymore!"
"Oh really! It's not like you didnt change! You werent like this way back! Do you remember how forthcoming and light you were when we met the first time?"
"That was when you were fun. Then you focused on your work. I was invisible to you. You were not even conscious of my presence. Did not pay attention to the lunch I packed for you. All that mattered was your ambition."
There was a pause... In the noise.
Marshall started making it's presence felt.
Some folks can lose the blues in their hearts
But when I think of you another shower starts
Into each life some rain must fall
But too much is falling in mine
An eternity passed. Heavy breaths. Panting breaths. High stress on the angry bodies that were shouting. In another day and age, these breaths denoted a home coming. A coming together of hearts and bodies. Heaviness denoting an earth shattering climax. A common goal that was happy. That was not a race. That help love. That held safety.
The battle resumed.
"There was a time when you initiated interesting chats. There was a time when you asked me out. told me how pretty I looked. Heck, you bought me clothes."
"Fk- is that what this is about? It is an easy thing to fix. Let's go shopping and I shall buy you clothes".
Pause.........
Heavy breathing.
"Dont insult me like that ever again. I dont need your monies. I make enough of mine to take me shopping. I am hinting that you lost interest in me"
"What non sense? It's not like we are teenagers. Of course we go thru journeys that can make us weary. But this is life, Isnt'it?"
Marshall stopped playing the song. But thought for a second- how/why do these people turn me "on" and then fight? It's like there is no respect in my letting go off my beauty. Such a waste of my energy and sperm! :-) Well, Marshall is of course that boy. :-)
His thoughts were perturbed. Yet again. Someone started yelling. He was sure it was Ella from deep his belly. This was one of his personal favourites.
BUT. The noise overtook his thought process again and he sighed.
"Why should I accept this unhappy life? You gave me this ring and told me your soul was in it. You said it was for both of us. And yet- you removed yours so nonchalantly. Didnt you think I noticed?"
"Heck- it cant be about the ring!! I am happy to wear it again but it was feeling uncomfy and I removed. There was no other thought to that action except my comfort. Is that too much to understand?"
"Yes. Yes it is too much to understand. I could have understood you had you involved me in your journey. Had you included me in it. You and I had very separate paths and you decided it was OK."
"That's not true. You got the benefits of my hard work too. Let's just say that both of us screwed up and move on from here. I am tired of this fighting. Can we call it quits?"
"Actually... No. Sometimes. It is not both the people who screw up. It is only one of them. In our case, it was most definitely you. That's a mistake. It was not expectations. But it was your jaded philosophy of rationalizing what works for you. And at the same time getting conveniences from me. Let's call out."
Marshall wilted. Fitzgerald was egging him to complete the song.
Into each life some rain must fall
But too much, too much is fallin' in mine
Into each heart some tears must fall
But some day the sun will shine
But some day the sun will shine. Unfortunately neither of them have invested in patience. And honesty. he sighed again. He knew for sure over the past generations that he has been seeing the family, that the only truth of the matter was Marshall was never utilized to the fullest. Fk, he had a brilliant voice. Aye, he did.
His dad Jim must be rolling in his grave.
Good post. Brilliant
ReplyDeleteBut had to read this twice to understand what it meant. Finally I think I got it.