I read this fantastic piece of writing by Chandrika today. Chandrika is a dear friend and I have super fond memories from the past. Many meals together. We were a riot. But I digress- that post will be for another day.
I couldnt help but think about my own life. Muse. Drama in my mind obviously got a trickling tear or two out of eyes. Maybe more than a couple.
I dont believe in love. I said it. Ouch! That sounded harsh. But here is my theory- love is imaginary... It is non existent. Everything that happens in and around that place is very heady and surreal. Nothing to keep you grounded. The problem with not being grounded is- it is very easy to be in the air. It takes nothing to be happily floating around. Until one day you realize that there was nothing that was holding you up. It were our own thoughts. Imagination. Human minds can be very powerful.
So from the highs and pinks, suddenly you see it for what it is. I also fancied to be in love when love had a very different meaning in my life. It is never easy to fall or be in love. Not for me. But when I was, he was the Sun in our universe. Here's the truth about being the sun- he does many many things. I was just another planet. An important planet in 'his' universe. But I was neither his sun nor his star.
The madness in all of this is you dont realize it is not OK. That the Sun does it's thing. Anyone goes near it any close and it will singe you to death. I went too close without realizing I was being singed- unintentionally of course.
And then my debris cried hard. The moment of disillusionment amidst all the of the knowledge that the Sun gives.
Sun is as flawed as the planet. I became my own star. And the Sun? In my view became another planet. An important one.
That's love. If it existed. It is not about theories. It is not about choices. It is about me and my perception unto myself. Everybody and every thing else is exactly that- not you.
End of the day what mattered was I got my debris. I got my little life. I started living slowly but steadily. Surely. I am me.
I couldnt help but think about my own life. Muse. Drama in my mind obviously got a trickling tear or two out of eyes. Maybe more than a couple.
I dont believe in love. I said it. Ouch! That sounded harsh. But here is my theory- love is imaginary... It is non existent. Everything that happens in and around that place is very heady and surreal. Nothing to keep you grounded. The problem with not being grounded is- it is very easy to be in the air. It takes nothing to be happily floating around. Until one day you realize that there was nothing that was holding you up. It were our own thoughts. Imagination. Human minds can be very powerful.
So from the highs and pinks, suddenly you see it for what it is. I also fancied to be in love when love had a very different meaning in my life. It is never easy to fall or be in love. Not for me. But when I was, he was the Sun in our universe. Here's the truth about being the sun- he does many many things. I was just another planet. An important planet in 'his' universe. But I was neither his sun nor his star.
The madness in all of this is you dont realize it is not OK. That the Sun does it's thing. Anyone goes near it any close and it will singe you to death. I went too close without realizing I was being singed- unintentionally of course.
And then my debris cried hard. The moment of disillusionment amidst all the of the knowledge that the Sun gives.
Sun is as flawed as the planet. I became my own star. And the Sun? In my view became another planet. An important one.
That's love. If it existed. It is not about theories. It is not about choices. It is about me and my perception unto myself. Everybody and every thing else is exactly that- not you.
End of the day what mattered was I got my debris. I got my little life. I started living slowly but steadily. Surely. I am me.
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